Choosing a vertical life, rather than a horizontal one. Sinking deeply into a moment, relishing sensations, paying attention, and appreciating what surrounds us. Being a plant, rather than a mammal. Staying put, instead of being in constant movement.
As I read your essay, Tommy, I wanted to sit in a cozy window seat and observe the winter landscape.
After traveling, having a busy December, and feeling drained, I declared that I would not leave my home today or do any chores. It felt luxurious to work on a jigsaw puzzle, watch television, knit, play a video game, and read messages. Your essay was one of the treats I found in my mail.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Once again, you have presented fascinating ideas in a poetic way.
Wow J.T. I’m almost hesitant to respond to spoil how beautiful your words here are.
Sinking deeply into the moment is exactly it. I read recently: “To feel abandoned is to deny the intimacy of your surroundings.” There’s so much wonder and beauty and life around us, if we just pay attention.
A jigsaw puzzle, television, knitting, video game, and messages sound lovely. I hope it was a nourishing and restorative weekend. The world can spin so fast. I love those days I can stay home, slow down, and just be. Exist in the world of being instead of doing.
Thanks again for reading & being such an incredible light for me.
"Slowness is a result of curating an environment that cultivates slack instead of speed, perpetuates ease instead of urgency." Your writing is part of the scenery I enjoy in life.
Thanks so much Rick (: I take that compliment seriously to heart. Above all I want my writing to create those fleeting, terrifyingly beautiful feelings. That makes people remember how goddamn beautiful this life is. Add to the scenery.
"Terrifyingly beautiful" is an interesting pairing. Do you think the fact that beauty sometimes feels overwhelming, or hard to accept, is the reason that a part of us sometimes takes over and forces us to rush past the scene of its splendor?
I’ve been mulling this idea that beauty is somewhat terrifying because of decay. Everything is dying. Everything will end. Including us. We want to grip on a little longer, to the chorus of a song or brushstrokes on a canvas, but can’t forever.
Yes, that resonates with me. The presence of decay inherent in anything radiantly alive. The sublime is impermanent, so as we are invited to appreciate it, we are also warned of its brevity.
Once you do slow down, does slowness become the “norm(al)”? If slow is then normal, is it no longer slow? Can you live a speedy life but have a “slow” mind? Would that create a balance, like speed training for a marathon? As always, Tommy, you create food for thought. I promise to chew on these ideas slowly, relishing every bite.
I think of slowness as a state of being that’s kinda cultivated by the environment. Some environments speak slowness, others tell you to speed up.
I suppose it’s the definition. If slowness is patience and ease and self-knowing, I don’t want to speed up. But that being said, I don’t want to become geriatric. Slowness isn’t doing nothing, but doing aligned things intentionally.
My thoughts are still muddied on this which is why this essay didn’t turn out the best.
Thanks for reading dad and the thoughtful questions (:
Tommy - I only recently came across your substack serendipitously and boy am I glad I did. Your writing is so soothing, it really does feel like coming back home. I've recently been exploring slowness from many different angles, and most recently I wrote about slowness as an antidote to procrastination.
I just absolutely love the idea of horizontal and vertical time; I've never thought of it that way, but as soon as I read it something clicked immediately in me. So thank you for sharing this!
Zan, this was so cool to read. Thank you for taking the time to read my work & leave a kind note. Means a lot (:
Slowness as an antidote to procrastination is super interesting. I’ve also liked the idea of procrastination as signal - ie. if you’re procrastinating something it could be signal it’s not that important and you shouldn’t do it
Tommy, thanks so much for writing this essay. I read this at the most perfect time, and I'm absolutely happy I did.
I'm not in the best place right now, feeling a bit burnt out from work. I've been feeling like something is wrong in my life lately, but I couldn't figure out what. I thought my calendar is elaborate, my tasks are well-accounted for, and I even allot time to rest in the evening. So why do I feel like I'm struggling?
But when I read your essay, I thought, "THIS IS IT!" THIS is why I feel miserable. Everything started to click.
The moments I remember most vividly (and when I feel most at peace) are the moments when things slow down. They're saturday mornings when I journal in our balcony, quiet afternoons sitting quietly on a bench with our dog, and 5-minute breaks in between pomodoro sessions when I simply stare at the sky.
They all point to one thing: I have to learn how to live more deeply.
It's truly amazing how your writing can inspire people this much. Thank you for sharing your gift to the world.
Linart, wow this was such a special comment to read. Thank you man, I’m seriously so glad it resonated with you.
I get where you’re coming from. I’ve been feeling burnt out too. And I have all these routines and habits and discipline and when I still feel kinda “meh” it can be incredibly frustrating since I’m trying so hard to do all the right things.
You’re so right on those special moments where life just slows down. Like a Sunday morning. Everything is infinitely enough. Exactly as it should be. I find these pockets more in nature and away from technology - but it’s not the only place they exist.
I’m trying to live more deeply as well. It’s not easy or often encouraged.
lovely! needed this since i've been pondering why i'm slooooow with most things, very nice to have some reassurance that maybe i don't need to change that about myself
I think there’s so much beauty in slowness, deep breathing. Not rushing. More and more when I speed up, I feel my anxiety rise, my breath shorten and grip too tight.
Appreciate you reading & the thoughtful note. Hope you’re having a lovely weekend
Beautiful essay pal. The most consistent piece of advice I’ve give myself over the years is “SLOW DOWN.” I’ve written it on post it notes, jotted it in notebooks, set it as my screen saver, and done everything I can to etch it into the squiggles of my brain. I’m not very good at it… but I try. And it’s an aim I’m okay with striving for my whole life.
On my current travels, I’m staying in most places for no less than 6 nights. In conversations with fellow travellers, their mouths gape and they can barely hide their disapproval when I inform them of the duration of my stay and they inevitably ask “what are you going to do here for THAT long!!??” I subsequently wrap my hands around their scrawny necks to choke some sense into them. Kidding… of course. I smile awkwardly and give a half hearted answer. That’s usually the end of the conversation as it’s become apparent we’re on different wave lengths. Is 6 nights in one place really that long?
But even though I’m trying to find more slowness, I suck at it. When I have open time I panic trying to fill it. I struggle to sit still. To be in one place for too long. My attention span isn’t as relaxed and long and as honey like as I’d like it to be.
But you inspire me with your beautiful writing to stay true to the course. To live slowly. Even when it’s uncomfortable. And even when it’s what no one else is doing.
Jack, this comment was special. I know we’ve talked endlessly about this but I love how your thinking has evolved.
More and more I think it’s realizing nowhere is better than where you are. There’s nowhere to get to. Savouring the infinite enoughness of the current moment. Here. Now.
With travel, a lot of people are so fixated on the next place, checking off a list of things they’ve seen. I’d meet people in Rome and they could only talk about Florence.
It’s finding joy in the depth, really knowing a place, putting a finger on the pulse of the daily rhythms. Familiarity. Which only comes with time, patience, noticing.
Stay true to the course brother. The path is hard.
Slowing down doesn't make me slow; it actually can make things or tasks I do more efficient. People think I'm a nut when I try to explain this, but in the world we live in now, it can be challenging. I'm known as a quick person, but to me, it feels slow.
Ahhh I love that. I think there’s a huge connection between slowness and efficiency.
When you move slowly, you’re more intentional and attuned to your inner knowing and aligned with your intuition. You’re less likely to make mistakes. Measure twice, cut once.
I know too well what it’s like to move really fast doing a bunch of trivial work or make mistakes and things end up taking much longer. As Tolkien says “shortcuts make long delays”.
Thank you for taking the time to read & the thoughtful note. Appreciate you (:
Your essay is a good reminder on how to live deeper. I just needed this today 🙏. Thank you!
I think we all need to enjoy our journey, instead of just reaching some objectives. The journey is actually our life, our time, the most precious resource we have.
Beautiful piece! This is how I currently live. But I am only working part time and although I want to continue my current lifestyle, my bank account is telling me I can’t. How does one do a full time job that always requires speed and pace while living in a slow and comfortable way?
Thank you Cherie (: appreciate you reading. The split between the speed the world (and economy) seems to demand versus the soul's need for slowness is a tricky one, and not a question I have a particularly good answer to, unfortunately. One thing I've realized is that I need far less money than I thought, and I'm quite happy to keep my expenses low and buy very little. I'm not working a job currently, but I imagine this will afford me some flexibility to work at a slower, more human pace. Not sure.
Lovely essay plus photo, what I gem to find in my notes, thank you! I just love the serendipity and synchronicity one can find on this app :)
Reading tip on living with increased depth (or more vertical, i love that) through just the act of noticing: A Still Life by Josie George (she’s also here on Substack @bimblings)
Thank you Merel (: so glad it resonated. Serendipity is definitely magical huh. I think that about books too, how they always seem to find you at exactly the right time.
Appreciate you reading and the kind words - hope your weekend is slow and lovely
Choosing a vertical life, rather than a horizontal one. Sinking deeply into a moment, relishing sensations, paying attention, and appreciating what surrounds us. Being a plant, rather than a mammal. Staying put, instead of being in constant movement.
As I read your essay, Tommy, I wanted to sit in a cozy window seat and observe the winter landscape.
After traveling, having a busy December, and feeling drained, I declared that I would not leave my home today or do any chores. It felt luxurious to work on a jigsaw puzzle, watch television, knit, play a video game, and read messages. Your essay was one of the treats I found in my mail.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Once again, you have presented fascinating ideas in a poetic way.
Wow J.T. I’m almost hesitant to respond to spoil how beautiful your words here are.
Sinking deeply into the moment is exactly it. I read recently: “To feel abandoned is to deny the intimacy of your surroundings.” There’s so much wonder and beauty and life around us, if we just pay attention.
A jigsaw puzzle, television, knitting, video game, and messages sound lovely. I hope it was a nourishing and restorative weekend. The world can spin so fast. I love those days I can stay home, slow down, and just be. Exist in the world of being instead of doing.
Thanks again for reading & being such an incredible light for me.
Tommy, your reply is as moving as your essay! Thank you.
🫶
"Slowness is a result of curating an environment that cultivates slack instead of speed, perpetuates ease instead of urgency." Your writing is part of the scenery I enjoy in life.
Thanks so much Rick (: I take that compliment seriously to heart. Above all I want my writing to create those fleeting, terrifyingly beautiful feelings. That makes people remember how goddamn beautiful this life is. Add to the scenery.
Hope you’re having a lovely weekend
"Terrifyingly beautiful" is an interesting pairing. Do you think the fact that beauty sometimes feels overwhelming, or hard to accept, is the reason that a part of us sometimes takes over and forces us to rush past the scene of its splendor?
Hmmm that’s a really good question.
I’ve been mulling this idea that beauty is somewhat terrifying because of decay. Everything is dying. Everything will end. Including us. We want to grip on a little longer, to the chorus of a song or brushstrokes on a canvas, but can’t forever.
Perhaps “the sublime” is a better term
Yes, that resonates with me. The presence of decay inherent in anything radiantly alive. The sublime is impermanent, so as we are invited to appreciate it, we are also warned of its brevity.
Beautiful Rick. Once you’re king of public speaking you gotta give poetry a go (:
Once you do slow down, does slowness become the “norm(al)”? If slow is then normal, is it no longer slow? Can you live a speedy life but have a “slow” mind? Would that create a balance, like speed training for a marathon? As always, Tommy, you create food for thought. I promise to chew on these ideas slowly, relishing every bite.
I think of slowness as a state of being that’s kinda cultivated by the environment. Some environments speak slowness, others tell you to speed up.
I suppose it’s the definition. If slowness is patience and ease and self-knowing, I don’t want to speed up. But that being said, I don’t want to become geriatric. Slowness isn’t doing nothing, but doing aligned things intentionally.
My thoughts are still muddied on this which is why this essay didn’t turn out the best.
Thanks for reading dad and the thoughtful questions (:
Tommy, this essay was spectacular. As I read it I was thinking of what I would highlight. I stopped because I would highlight the WHOLE THING!
Thanks so much James (: always brings a smile to my face to see your name in the comments
Really appreciate you reading & glad it resonated
You’re going to enjoy Asia
Haha can’t wait. It just might turn out to be a longer trip than anticipated.
Thanks for the note Paul (: appreciate it
Tommy - I only recently came across your substack serendipitously and boy am I glad I did. Your writing is so soothing, it really does feel like coming back home. I've recently been exploring slowness from many different angles, and most recently I wrote about slowness as an antidote to procrastination.
I just absolutely love the idea of horizontal and vertical time; I've never thought of it that way, but as soon as I read it something clicked immediately in me. So thank you for sharing this!
Zan, this was so cool to read. Thank you for taking the time to read my work & leave a kind note. Means a lot (:
Slowness as an antidote to procrastination is super interesting. I’ve also liked the idea of procrastination as signal - ie. if you’re procrastinating something it could be signal it’s not that important and you shouldn’t do it
Hope you have a lovely rest of your week
Tommy, thanks so much for writing this essay. I read this at the most perfect time, and I'm absolutely happy I did.
I'm not in the best place right now, feeling a bit burnt out from work. I've been feeling like something is wrong in my life lately, but I couldn't figure out what. I thought my calendar is elaborate, my tasks are well-accounted for, and I even allot time to rest in the evening. So why do I feel like I'm struggling?
But when I read your essay, I thought, "THIS IS IT!" THIS is why I feel miserable. Everything started to click.
The moments I remember most vividly (and when I feel most at peace) are the moments when things slow down. They're saturday mornings when I journal in our balcony, quiet afternoons sitting quietly on a bench with our dog, and 5-minute breaks in between pomodoro sessions when I simply stare at the sky.
They all point to one thing: I have to learn how to live more deeply.
It's truly amazing how your writing can inspire people this much. Thank you for sharing your gift to the world.
Linart, wow this was such a special comment to read. Thank you man, I’m seriously so glad it resonated with you.
I get where you’re coming from. I’ve been feeling burnt out too. And I have all these routines and habits and discipline and when I still feel kinda “meh” it can be incredibly frustrating since I’m trying so hard to do all the right things.
You’re so right on those special moments where life just slows down. Like a Sunday morning. Everything is infinitely enough. Exactly as it should be. I find these pockets more in nature and away from technology - but it’s not the only place they exist.
I’m trying to live more deeply as well. It’s not easy or often encouraged.
Wishing you the best man. The path is hard.
Warmly,
Tommy
lovely! needed this since i've been pondering why i'm slooooow with most things, very nice to have some reassurance that maybe i don't need to change that about myself
Mallika! So good to hear from you (:
I think there’s so much beauty in slowness, deep breathing. Not rushing. More and more when I speed up, I feel my anxiety rise, my breath shorten and grip too tight.
Appreciate you reading & the thoughtful note. Hope you’re having a lovely weekend
Beautiful essay pal. The most consistent piece of advice I’ve give myself over the years is “SLOW DOWN.” I’ve written it on post it notes, jotted it in notebooks, set it as my screen saver, and done everything I can to etch it into the squiggles of my brain. I’m not very good at it… but I try. And it’s an aim I’m okay with striving for my whole life.
On my current travels, I’m staying in most places for no less than 6 nights. In conversations with fellow travellers, their mouths gape and they can barely hide their disapproval when I inform them of the duration of my stay and they inevitably ask “what are you going to do here for THAT long!!??” I subsequently wrap my hands around their scrawny necks to choke some sense into them. Kidding… of course. I smile awkwardly and give a half hearted answer. That’s usually the end of the conversation as it’s become apparent we’re on different wave lengths. Is 6 nights in one place really that long?
But even though I’m trying to find more slowness, I suck at it. When I have open time I panic trying to fill it. I struggle to sit still. To be in one place for too long. My attention span isn’t as relaxed and long and as honey like as I’d like it to be.
But you inspire me with your beautiful writing to stay true to the course. To live slowly. Even when it’s uncomfortable. And even when it’s what no one else is doing.
Thanks for writing buddy.
Jack, this comment was special. I know we’ve talked endlessly about this but I love how your thinking has evolved.
More and more I think it’s realizing nowhere is better than where you are. There’s nowhere to get to. Savouring the infinite enoughness of the current moment. Here. Now.
With travel, a lot of people are so fixated on the next place, checking off a list of things they’ve seen. I’d meet people in Rome and they could only talk about Florence.
It’s finding joy in the depth, really knowing a place, putting a finger on the pulse of the daily rhythms. Familiarity. Which only comes with time, patience, noticing.
Stay true to the course brother. The path is hard.
Slowing down doesn't make me slow; it actually can make things or tasks I do more efficient. People think I'm a nut when I try to explain this, but in the world we live in now, it can be challenging. I'm known as a quick person, but to me, it feels slow.
Good read today Tommy 👍
Ahhh I love that. I think there’s a huge connection between slowness and efficiency.
When you move slowly, you’re more intentional and attuned to your inner knowing and aligned with your intuition. You’re less likely to make mistakes. Measure twice, cut once.
I know too well what it’s like to move really fast doing a bunch of trivial work or make mistakes and things end up taking much longer. As Tolkien says “shortcuts make long delays”.
Thank you for taking the time to read & the thoughtful note. Appreciate you (:
Your essay is a good reminder on how to live deeper. I just needed this today 🙏. Thank you!
I think we all need to enjoy our journey, instead of just reaching some objectives. The journey is actually our life, our time, the most precious resource we have.
Thank you Florentina (: super appreciate you reading & the kind words
I like your words :) The honey metaphor, and this one: "Nothing brings aliveness to experience like noticing." Really dense sentence, nice!
Thank you Julia :) appreciate you reading & the kind words
Such a memorable piece, Tommy, thank you
Thank you for reading Miranda (: means a lot
Beautiful piece! This is how I currently live. But I am only working part time and although I want to continue my current lifestyle, my bank account is telling me I can’t. How does one do a full time job that always requires speed and pace while living in a slow and comfortable way?
Thank you Cherie (: appreciate you reading. The split between the speed the world (and economy) seems to demand versus the soul's need for slowness is a tricky one, and not a question I have a particularly good answer to, unfortunately. One thing I've realized is that I need far less money than I thought, and I'm quite happy to keep my expenses low and buy very little. I'm not working a job currently, but I imagine this will afford me some flexibility to work at a slower, more human pace. Not sure.
Lovely essay plus photo, what I gem to find in my notes, thank you! I just love the serendipity and synchronicity one can find on this app :)
Reading tip on living with increased depth (or more vertical, i love that) through just the act of noticing: A Still Life by Josie George (she’s also here on Substack @bimblings)
PS: The painter’s name is Barry McGlashan :)
Thank you Merel (: so glad it resonated. Serendipity is definitely magical huh. I think that about books too, how they always seem to find you at exactly the right time.
Appreciate you reading and the kind words - hope your weekend is slow and lovely
Thank you Tommy, same to you!
And yes, books and their timing are the best magic :)
So beautifully said 🩷it truly made me stop and reflect on my own addiction to speedy life.
So glad to hear Alexandra (: thank you for reading and hope you have some time for slowness this weekend
Austinite here – glad you liked our little town!
Loved it Dawson (: keep Austin weird