This inner conflict between having roots/rootlessness is put so beautifully in this essay. I used to romanticize rootlessness. I probably still romanticize it now. But every time I travel, I long for the daily routines that ground me in place. I know, though, that one day I will uproot my life. I moved here nine years ago and never intended to stay forever.
Wherever you are, in whichever period your life is in, I'm rooting for you. (Sorry, I just had to!)
So true Rebecca. It's so easy to romanticize whatever stage you're not in. When I travel I miss the comforts of home and the stability of routine, but when I'm home I long for the excitement and variety of travel.
i stepped into my 30s officially recently, but this feeling of rootlessness in my 20s - you captured it perfectly. there are always places to be, things to do, a lot of confusion, not a lot of stillness. it is an exciting time of life, but it is easy to be overwhelmed by everything that is happening. don't forget to smell the flowers, cliche but true!
You are so very welcome! Honestly, your posts are probably the first ones I've ever commented on on Substack! Great job creating such an approachable vibe. :)
I just wanted to add the thought of trying to love the hard small moments too. I know you probably intended to encapsulate any type of small moment (good, bad, boring, etc.) but I just wanted to share that I think this concept has been helping me to particularly embrace and seek to be grateful for hard moments too. I know what I have to share is pretty simple but just felt like sharing. :)
That’s an incredibly kind compliment. I’m so glad you did comment. Seriously adds a lot of richness to my life :)
Being grateful for the hard moments is something I’m continually learning. It’s simple on the surface but I think life’s deepest lessons and truths are all simple :)
Andy, so so good to hear from you. Made my day. Hope you're awesome in NYC.
Thank you for reading and really glad you enjoyed it :) I wanted to capture the idea of roots and home in a way that makes people just feel okay where they are -- hope I did that a little bit.
Stay well man and hope to continue to keep in touch!
There's certainly a tension or push/pull between certainty and variety, routine and adventure. Hard to balance but I think you've done an excellent job at it. Agree in your 20s it's a good time to be a lil' uncomfortable.
Just wanted to say how incredibly relatable that essay was. I couldn’t have described the feeling better myself, just awesome and comforting to have someone who relates to exactly what I’ve been feeling and brings some calmness in a period of instability. So, thank you❤️
The “rootless” freedoms you have is what many of the “rooted” crave. Wandering freely, going where the breeze blows you, no 9-5 Monday to Friday, no house to clean and repair, no kids to ferry around, no spouse to please, debate with, compromise with. Right now, you “have it all”. Or do you? If we always want what we don’t have and fail to appreciate our current blessings, we will soon be that 40 year old with the drudge job, the huge mortgage, the demanding kids and perhaps unloving spouse. Then we will remember fondly the “rootlessness” of our youth. Feel present - be blessed :)
I had that exact discussion as a section in my original essay but it was removed in the edits.
"Maybe I’m too young to settle somewhere, to plant roots, when I have my whole life ahead of me. I should cherish this time of little responsibility, much freedom... I may crave routine, predictability now when I feel deprived of it. But the instance I settle in, dig myself into the soil, I’ll long for the weightlessness of optionality and seek to shrug the weight of commitment."
The answer then, is the answer to so many complex questions: to be present, to embrace life for all that it is, when it is.
This inner conflict between having roots/rootlessness is put so beautifully in this essay. I used to romanticize rootlessness. I probably still romanticize it now. But every time I travel, I long for the daily routines that ground me in place. I know, though, that one day I will uproot my life. I moved here nine years ago and never intended to stay forever.
Wherever you are, in whichever period your life is in, I'm rooting for you. (Sorry, I just had to!)
So true Rebecca. It's so easy to romanticize whatever stage you're not in. When I travel I miss the comforts of home and the stability of routine, but when I'm home I long for the excitement and variety of travel.
Love the pun :) brought a smile to my face
i stepped into my 30s officially recently, but this feeling of rootlessness in my 20s - you captured it perfectly. there are always places to be, things to do, a lot of confusion, not a lot of stillness. it is an exciting time of life, but it is easy to be overwhelmed by everything that is happening. don't forget to smell the flowers, cliche but true!
Bobby, thanks so much for reading & the thoughtful reflection you left.
Exciting but overwhelming is exactly it. Both alivened and terrified by freedom, possibility, potential.
Glad this resonated & thank you again (: means a lot
Appreciated these lines, Tommy.
"The secret—the battle that must be fought anew every day—is patience, presence, intention. To cultivate and love each small moment. "
Particularly the loving each small moment part. Something to strive for. Thank you for your writing!
Mariah! Thanks so much for reading & the kind note. Brought a big smile to my face :)
I’m a big fan of small moments. There’s so much beauty to be found in simply paying attention.
Thanks again. Hope you have a lovely week !
You are so very welcome! Honestly, your posts are probably the first ones I've ever commented on on Substack! Great job creating such an approachable vibe. :)
I just wanted to add the thought of trying to love the hard small moments too. I know you probably intended to encapsulate any type of small moment (good, bad, boring, etc.) but I just wanted to share that I think this concept has been helping me to particularly embrace and seek to be grateful for hard moments too. I know what I have to share is pretty simple but just felt like sharing. :)
Hope you are having a beautiful day, sir!
That’s an incredibly kind compliment. I’m so glad you did comment. Seriously adds a lot of richness to my life :)
Being grateful for the hard moments is something I’m continually learning. It’s simple on the surface but I think life’s deepest lessons and truths are all simple :)
"Being 20-something is to be brimming with ambition and action, but empty of stability, certainty."
ahhhh I feel so seen reading this piece... thank you Tommy!! Hope all is well! :)
Andy, so so good to hear from you. Made my day. Hope you're awesome in NYC.
Thank you for reading and really glad you enjoyed it :) I wanted to capture the idea of roots and home in a way that makes people just feel okay where they are -- hope I did that a little bit.
Stay well man and hope to continue to keep in touch!
Yessir! Look forward to catching up with the gang some time soon!!
Something that I've truly battled over the last little while personally.
The desire for a constant community, routine, and environment.
Yet, I think it's important to keep yourself on your toes in your 20s :)
Thanks for reading and the note Sul :)
There's certainly a tension or push/pull between certainty and variety, routine and adventure. Hard to balance but I think you've done an excellent job at it. Agree in your 20s it's a good time to be a lil' uncomfortable.
Even the comment sections of yours are good reads. Thanks for sharing Tommy 🙌
Thank you for the kind words :) brought a smile to my day
Really appreciate you reading!
Just wanted to say how incredibly relatable that essay was. I couldn’t have described the feeling better myself, just awesome and comforting to have someone who relates to exactly what I’ve been feeling and brings some calmness in a period of instability. So, thank you❤️
Rachel, thank you so much for the kind words. And taking the time to leave a comment and let me know your thoughts. Literally made my week :)
I'm glad it resonated and brought some semblance of calm. Makes me v happy.
Keep well.
The “rootless” freedoms you have is what many of the “rooted” crave. Wandering freely, going where the breeze blows you, no 9-5 Monday to Friday, no house to clean and repair, no kids to ferry around, no spouse to please, debate with, compromise with. Right now, you “have it all”. Or do you? If we always want what we don’t have and fail to appreciate our current blessings, we will soon be that 40 year old with the drudge job, the huge mortgage, the demanding kids and perhaps unloving spouse. Then we will remember fondly the “rootlessness” of our youth. Feel present - be blessed :)
I had that exact discussion as a section in my original essay but it was removed in the edits.
"Maybe I’m too young to settle somewhere, to plant roots, when I have my whole life ahead of me. I should cherish this time of little responsibility, much freedom... I may crave routine, predictability now when I feel deprived of it. But the instance I settle in, dig myself into the soil, I’ll long for the weightlessness of optionality and seek to shrug the weight of commitment."
The answer then, is the answer to so many complex questions: to be present, to embrace life for all that it is, when it is.
Love, Tommy