a collection of anecdotes I’ve been thinking about creating more agency in my life. I am a young man that falls into old ways. Gaining agency is gaining the capacity to push back against inertia. To act outside of it. To do things beyond the events that merely happen to me.
I absolutely love this essay, Tommy! I think it is so true we stop allowing ourselves to express or experiment with our creative self once the demands of “every day” life take priority. Over time, our creativity seems to sit dormant, yet it’s still there if we allow it space in our days! Your points about not hesitating on taking action is inspiring! I love how your piece offers a simple and tangible solution. I agree, the learning comes from the act of doing, it’s in our hands to use without requiring tutorials or lectures first. An art or craft or skill can evolve and develop as we experiment and experience if only we let it!!! We just need to give it our time and attention. Thanks for writing, Tommy!
This is a fantastic jump-start of inspiration to explore greater agency in life. Especially loved, "The first part of creating agency is shortening the window between idea and action. If I wait to act on my ideas, time brings rationality which kills agency. It almost always seems more rational not to act, to wait for a better time. Inertia loves inaction."
ahhh thank you for giving me a widened awareness of the things i am not doing, that i wish i was!! (like commenting and reaching out on substack, oops)
Saraii! Thanks so much for reading & reaching out (:
Agency is definitely tough. I go through periods of high and low agency (often correlated with my degree of burnout) - but I know from experience, life feels a lot richer and more alive when I am in a state of high agency (low burnout)
Thank you Catalina. For reading and the kind words. Made my day brighter :)
I once heard the term “hopelessly self aware” and thought it was a good self description.
Photography is a great way to get out more & walk more but cat photos are also awesome. Big fan. I’m trying to think of it just as capturing what is beautiful, so I notice and appreciate the beauty in my life more.
Life is indeed a journey. Face your Fear. Take action. It is easier to ask for forgiveness than to seek permission. Connect with others. Live, Love, Laugh..... super proud of having the privilege of seeing your writing evolve, reading your reflections as the 4 year old, the 12 year old, the uni kid, the corporate wanna be, the beautiful soul you are growing into, acting out on and and living each day!
I think for the same reasons people look at me and call me an old soul, I look at you and think the same. I too admire the builders and creators that honor their craft with practices that stand the test of time, who build slowly, and with intention. I admire the creators that through their craft build an understanding and an even more intense curiosity for the world around them. Dignity is always the word that comes to mind.
Similarly, I have likewise found myself in a place where I am recovering from the academic and accomplishment burnout but I want to honor the part of you that studies, learns, exercises, and researches. Isn't it that side of you the foundation for which you will become a builder or a creator yourself? Isn't it that side of you where you grew your taste, diligence, and dignity?
Lastly, I love the idea you shared about reducing the time spend between idea and action. Sometimes I feel like my backlog of ideas piles up until it is much too overwhelming and confusing to act on. I want the rest of this year heading into next year to be about taking small bets in that period of time that immediately follows an idea. I know at least from watching others that their curiosity and excitement is palpable when they don't permit an idea to lose its shine by letting is sit amongst a crowded list of others.
This was beautiful. I hope we have the chance to share a slow meal with our other writer friends around a large wobbly table sometime soon.
Haley, first off thank you for leaving such a beautiful and thoughtful comment. I somewhat don’t feel deserving but I deeply appreciate it.
I have been called an old soul for as long as I can remember. We are kindred indeed.
You’re so right about not diminishing that other side of me. It’s a delicate balance. To grow and move on from your past but not diminish or disgrace it but love it - for it is yours and made you who you are. And there is certainly a studious side of me I don’t want to ignore.
I have such a big backlog of ideas. I think that was the catalyst for this essay. To remind myself to pull these into the present instead of adding to the backlog.
I’m excited to see you on that journey. I was inspired by that drawing of a deer you shared - such a great example of agency, extending your creative expression outside your comfort zone.
I’m not confident about many things but I am confident the world is a better place with Haley creating in it.
I hope we can too sometime :) perhaps after a nice walk in nature
Yes. Narrowing that window between idea and action makes all the difference. Being able to do so shouldn't be a gift, a privilege. It's something available to all of us. All it takes is -- maybe -- focusing beyond what's right in front of your mind. Awesome piece, Tommy. So thoughtful and relatable.
Thank you for reading Silvio and leaving such a thoughtful note, as always.
“Focusing beyond what’s right in front of your mind” feels precisely right. I’m having to work through mental scripts that say I should be too busy for this or it’s not productive. Trying to let joy be my guide.
I really really needed to read this! So crazy how tomorrow mornings newsletter for The Khaotic Good is similar to this in a way, just a different perspective. And I have a mention of you in there! Funny how things work like that.
Anyways, I really enjoyed reading this and a lot of things stuck out to me, and I realize I really need to just start doing and stop thinking about all these “dreams”. Even the little things. Like learning guitar or just putting myself out there in ways I have forgotten how to. I haven’t got a thing to lose. Honestly this helped me realize a lot of things about my life as a whole and I give you a big thanks!
Kayla! Wow thank you for reading and continuing to leave such thoughtful words. I’ve been spoiled.
I’m so glad it resonated. It’s certainly been an uphill battle for me but one I continue to climb. It’s liberating to give myself permission to act, to learn, to try new things. Something in creation, in the attempt, in trying new things, that feels intensely correct.
I absolutely love this essay, Tommy! I think it is so true we stop allowing ourselves to express or experiment with our creative self once the demands of “every day” life take priority. Over time, our creativity seems to sit dormant, yet it’s still there if we allow it space in our days! Your points about not hesitating on taking action is inspiring! I love how your piece offers a simple and tangible solution. I agree, the learning comes from the act of doing, it’s in our hands to use without requiring tutorials or lectures first. An art or craft or skill can evolve and develop as we experiment and experience if only we let it!!! We just need to give it our time and attention. Thanks for writing, Tommy!
This is a fantastic jump-start of inspiration to explore greater agency in life. Especially loved, "The first part of creating agency is shortening the window between idea and action. If I wait to act on my ideas, time brings rationality which kills agency. It almost always seems more rational not to act, to wait for a better time. Inertia loves inaction."
Thanks Rick :) really appreciate you being such a wonderful supporter. Means a lot to me
My pleasure Tommy.
ahhh thank you for giving me a widened awareness of the things i am not doing, that i wish i was!! (like commenting and reaching out on substack, oops)
Saraii! Thanks so much for reading & reaching out (:
Agency is definitely tough. I go through periods of high and low agency (often correlated with my degree of burnout) - but I know from experience, life feels a lot richer and more alive when I am in a state of high agency (low burnout)
Wishing you all the best (:
You live your life with an enviable level of self-awareness, Tommy. I really admire that.
I also set a goal this year to learn photography and take more photos, but I need to get out more because all my photos are of my cat. 😅
Thank you Catalina. For reading and the kind words. Made my day brighter :)
I once heard the term “hopelessly self aware” and thought it was a good self description.
Photography is a great way to get out more & walk more but cat photos are also awesome. Big fan. I’m trying to think of it just as capturing what is beautiful, so I notice and appreciate the beauty in my life more.
Life is indeed a journey. Face your Fear. Take action. It is easier to ask for forgiveness than to seek permission. Connect with others. Live, Love, Laugh..... super proud of having the privilege of seeing your writing evolve, reading your reflections as the 4 year old, the 12 year old, the uni kid, the corporate wanna be, the beautiful soul you are growing into, acting out on and and living each day!
Thanks Dad :) appreciate you reading & the kind words as always
I have so much to say -
I think for the same reasons people look at me and call me an old soul, I look at you and think the same. I too admire the builders and creators that honor their craft with practices that stand the test of time, who build slowly, and with intention. I admire the creators that through their craft build an understanding and an even more intense curiosity for the world around them. Dignity is always the word that comes to mind.
Similarly, I have likewise found myself in a place where I am recovering from the academic and accomplishment burnout but I want to honor the part of you that studies, learns, exercises, and researches. Isn't it that side of you the foundation for which you will become a builder or a creator yourself? Isn't it that side of you where you grew your taste, diligence, and dignity?
Lastly, I love the idea you shared about reducing the time spend between idea and action. Sometimes I feel like my backlog of ideas piles up until it is much too overwhelming and confusing to act on. I want the rest of this year heading into next year to be about taking small bets in that period of time that immediately follows an idea. I know at least from watching others that their curiosity and excitement is palpable when they don't permit an idea to lose its shine by letting is sit amongst a crowded list of others.
This was beautiful. I hope we have the chance to share a slow meal with our other writer friends around a large wobbly table sometime soon.
Haley, first off thank you for leaving such a beautiful and thoughtful comment. I somewhat don’t feel deserving but I deeply appreciate it.
I have been called an old soul for as long as I can remember. We are kindred indeed.
You’re so right about not diminishing that other side of me. It’s a delicate balance. To grow and move on from your past but not diminish or disgrace it but love it - for it is yours and made you who you are. And there is certainly a studious side of me I don’t want to ignore.
I have such a big backlog of ideas. I think that was the catalyst for this essay. To remind myself to pull these into the present instead of adding to the backlog.
I’m excited to see you on that journey. I was inspired by that drawing of a deer you shared - such a great example of agency, extending your creative expression outside your comfort zone.
I’m not confident about many things but I am confident the world is a better place with Haley creating in it.
I hope we can too sometime :) perhaps after a nice walk in nature
Yes. Narrowing that window between idea and action makes all the difference. Being able to do so shouldn't be a gift, a privilege. It's something available to all of us. All it takes is -- maybe -- focusing beyond what's right in front of your mind. Awesome piece, Tommy. So thoughtful and relatable.
Thank you for reading Silvio and leaving such a thoughtful note, as always.
“Focusing beyond what’s right in front of your mind” feels precisely right. I’m having to work through mental scripts that say I should be too busy for this or it’s not productive. Trying to let joy be my guide.
Appreciate your support :)
Isn't it so freeing, liberating to immediately act on creative impulses? It's an energetic charge unlike any other.
Liberating is exactly the right word! Had it in this piece but removed somewhere in the edits.
This kinda feels similar to some of your writing on creativity and creative expression so glad it resonated Becky :)
I really really needed to read this! So crazy how tomorrow mornings newsletter for The Khaotic Good is similar to this in a way, just a different perspective. And I have a mention of you in there! Funny how things work like that.
Anyways, I really enjoyed reading this and a lot of things stuck out to me, and I realize I really need to just start doing and stop thinking about all these “dreams”. Even the little things. Like learning guitar or just putting myself out there in ways I have forgotten how to. I haven’t got a thing to lose. Honestly this helped me realize a lot of things about my life as a whole and I give you a big thanks!
Kayla! Wow thank you for reading and continuing to leave such thoughtful words. I’ve been spoiled.
I’m so glad it resonated. It’s certainly been an uphill battle for me but one I continue to climb. It’s liberating to give myself permission to act, to learn, to try new things. Something in creation, in the attempt, in trying new things, that feels intensely correct.
Appreciate you :)
👏✍️
Thank you my friend