☕ saturday mornings - November 5, 2022

forming opinions, slowing down & handling pain

Happy Saturday!

I hope you’re having a great start to your weekend.

What I’ve been up to:

• It's been a laid-back week of long walks in nature, reading, and connecting with family.

• I'm working on an essay about why most monarchs, due to their political irrelevance and immense wealth, should become effective altruists. I may scrap the idea, but if it's something that sounds interesting to you, let me know!

Thanks for taking the time to read my newsletter as you kick off your weekend. Your support means the world to me. 🙂

Here's a recap of the most interesting things I've explored this week.

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✍️ Quotes I’m pondering:

F. Scott Fitzgerald, an American novelist, on weighing both sides:

“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.”

Charlie Munger, Warren Buffett's business partner, on forming opinions:

“I never allow myself to have an opinion on anything that I don’t know the other side’s argument better than they do.”

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📚 Book passage I loved:

It is okay to take your time. We live in a generation that romanticizes moving forward as quickly as possible when it comes to careers and our futures and our success within them. But there is no point in rushing quickly towards a life that will not inspire you or fulfill you.

It is okay to slow down. It is okay to take the time you need. You are in no rush to figure out your own soul. It's never too late to start over, it's never too late to change your mind, it's never too late to redirect yourself, to replace the dreams you though you wanted for the ones that genuinely excite and challenge you.

― A Gentle Reminder by Bianca Sparacino

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💡 Idea from me: On Pain

Note: This is an idea I've thought about for years but never had the courage to share publicly. But, there is a lot of loneliness and pain in this world. I wanted to share this in case it helped anyone, the way it has helped me.

Life creates pain.

Some is inevitable: accidents, mishaps, and tragedies. Bad luck. Friends get sick and family passes away; a car accident, your house burns down, you get laid off. Some is caused by the words and actions of others: people can lie and cheat and do hurtful things.

Most is unfair.

One thing I've reflected on, as I'm becoming an adult, is that life is hard. Everyone is fighting a battle. It's given me a deeper admiration for my parents, but also made me realize how easy it can be to turn pessimistic and bitter. And, by any standard, I've had a fortunate life.

A big challenge in life is handling the pain it inevitably creates.

Some take their pain and reflect it back into the world. Others, out of malice, amplify their pain - they want the world to hurt more than they have. In the ancient world, there are a ton of examples of people who’ve done terrible things to others. In the modern world, proof is splattered across social media and news headlines.

But, some find ways to cope with pain in a productive way. They put less pain out into the world than they've had to deal with themselves. They transmute their suffering into something slightly more positive, despite how hard it is.

People have different ways of coping with pain. It can be through creation or exhaustion, service or community, indulgence or avoidance. Most have multiple.

Mac Miller, one of my favourite artists, spoke openly about his depression. He channeled his pain through music, but also, sadly, resorted to drugs. F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemmingway wrote some of the most beautiful sentences in the English language, but drank heavily. David Goggins suffered a terrible childhood but uses his pain to complete incredible feats of physical endurance, including running 200 miles nonstop in 39 hours and breaking a Guinness World Record for pull-ups (4,030).

Coping with pain can be viewed as the grassroots of Christianity. As David Perell writes, "Christianity promises a Living Hope that enables believers to endure unimaginable suffering." You bear your pain on earth, with dignity and composure, to be accepted to Heaven in the afterlife.

My musings on pain have led to two conclusions. One, find productive ways to cope with pain and spread less pain than I endure. As Jordan Peterson orates, "pick up your suffering and bear it. Try to be a good person so you don't make it worse".

Two, refuse to become bitter and resentful. "No matter what happens in life, keep a good heart," Islamic scholar Musa Menk writes. "A heart of patience and trust. A heart without hostility towards others. Don't let the darkness of this world harden your heart."

I want to be someone who is filled with love and radiates warmth for others.

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❓ Question for You:

If I had to describe who I wanted to be in 3 words what would those words be?

My three: Peaceful, Kind, and Curious.

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📸 Photo of the week:

A peaceful river, rolling plains, and a glimpse of the Pyrenees mountain range on a Fall walk outside Pamplona, Spain.

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If you have any feedback or just want to be friends, feel free to reach out.

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Have a fantastic weekend.

Much love to you and yours,

Tommy