☕ saturday mornings - april 22, 2023
genius, changing your thinking & trade-offs
Happy Saturday!
I hope you’re having a fantastic start to your weekend.
What I’ve been up to:
I finished up final exams and, with that, finished university!
I also completed the Past Authoring program. Over the past 5 weeks, I've written nearly 50,000 words about the most significant events in my life.
Write of Passage is officially underway (and just as exceptional as I remembered it). I'm also kicking off Seth Godin's altMBA on Monday.
Here's a recap of the most interesting ideas I've explored this week.
Enjoy.
✍️ quote i’m pondering:
John Berger, English artist, novelist and poet, on genius:
"We all forget continually.
The genius, because he watches himself, remembers. He naïvely remembers his dreams, he ruthlessly remembers his real experiences, and gradually, very gradually, he learns to remember the exact nature of his mistakes and successes as a man applying paint to a flat surface.
And so he recognizes what others have felt but never known.
Technique and genius are nothing more nor less than recognition."
📚 book passage i loved:
Thoughts are like data programmed into a computer, registered on the screen of your life. If you don’t like what you see on the screen, there’s no point in going up to the screen and trying to erase it.
Thought is cause; experience is effect.
If you don’t like the effects of your life, you have to change the nature of your thinking.
― A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson
💡 essay from me:
Life can feel like a lot sometimes.
No matter how much I manage to get done in a day, it still feels overwhelming. Too many desires and ambitions and hills to climb. Too many zoom calls and notifications and emails. Too many things to try to stay on top of.
It's easy to feel behind.
The list of things you want to do stubbornly growing longer than the things you can do. Just close enough to reach towards, but just far enough to elude your grasp.
Prioritization is hard.
You are composed of different parts with different priorities, that all compete for your finite time and attention and energy. The need for rest bristles against the need to work. The need to wander opposes the need to strive. The need for quiet and isolation against the need for connection and community.
Prioritization is hard because it's hard to choose which needs to listen to.
Every time I meet someone doing something cool or interesting, there's a part of me that thinks "Hey, maybe I should be doing that too." A part of me that wants to drop whatever I'm prioritizing, because what they're doing seems better. Plus with the Internet, you have instantaneous access to an infinite list of things other people are prioritizing. People raving about books you haven't read, posting workouts you haven't tried, and sharing projects you haven't done. It's hard to feel confident we're focusing on the right things.
We all want to live a good life, but there's no clear way to do it.
What should you prioritize? Happiness? Relationships? Money? Impact? Experience? Knowledge? Awakening? Longevity? You could find someone in each domain that tells you that it's the key to life. And even if you could perfectly optimize one of them, you certainly can't optimize for all of them.
So how do you choose correctly? How can you execute life such that you'll satisfy your needs and never feel you're missing out and have confidence you're living your life the right way?
You can't.
The inherent property of prioritization is that it will leave you in a state where you’re not perfectly satisfied with life. In exchange for one thing you want, you’ll have to give up something else you also want, and it will never feel good to lose that thing. You choose what feels more important. But there's a little part of you, a need that goes unheard and ignored, that aches at the doors that are closed, the paths that dead end, the lives that go unlived.
Oliver Burkeman: The problem with trying to make time for everything that feels important—or just for enough of what feels important—is that you definitely never will.
I read somewhere that everyone feels behind in one specific area. Some stable, rational people feel behind in adventure and experimentation. Some hard-working, focused people feel behind on spontaneity, play. Some successful people feel hopelessly dwarfed by their ambition, stretching towards goals that ceaselessly evade their grasp. Everyone wants to be somewhere they're not.
But, once you embrace that trade-offs are inevitable, needs will go unmet, and you probably always feel behind in one area, you can take a bit of pride in what you are choosing to prioritize. After all, you are choosing it!
I'm trying to live by this mantra: you can have everything you want, you just can’t have it all at once .
I'm trying to understand what I'm prioritizing at this spot on my timeline and the inevitable sacrifices that life requires. To look at the cool endeavours of others with admiration, not envy. “Yeah, well, that’s fine. I have this other thing going for me.” To realize I'm simply prioritizing different things. And, most of all, to cope with the fact that there are a million things I'm not doing, and will never do, but that's okay.
Henry Miller: The art of living is based on rhythm. By acceptance of all aspects of life, good and bad, right and wrong, yours and mine, the static, defensive life, which is what most people are cursed with, is converted into a dance, ‘the dance of life.’
I, like many people my age, want to do a lot of things.
Every day I learn of three new books I want to read, ten new essays, and a podcast. I want to bathe in interesting ideas. Explore the history of humanity and the archives of philosophy and the depths of spirituality. But I also want clarity and quiet to hear my own thoughts and intuition.
I want to live a healthy lifestyle. Cook good food, spend an hour each day meditating, exercise often, spend time in nature, and get sunlight on my skin. But then I want to write a lot and improve my craft. Share insights and reflections that help other people make sense of the world. I want to get things done, but not be stressed or rushed or overwhelmed.
I want to make enough money so I'm comfortable and have the freedom to go on adventures. I want to explore the world with all its nooks and crannies, but also reside in the routine and familiarity of home.
I want to connect with like-minded people who share my love for ideas. But I also want to be a good son and attentive brother and kind friend, who always has time for the people in his life.
I'm trying to learn to wait for things. Not need it all at once. Have patience and a little more faith. Surrender to this big, glorious, dance we call life.
I will never have all of these things at once, and the sooner I can accept that, the sooner I’ll be able to enjoy the precious fragments I do get to have.
PS: If you liked this one, you may also like avoiding no man’s land—an essay about conflicting wants.
❓ question i’m asking:
A question from Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung on finding your purpose:
What did you do as a child that made the hours pass like minutes?
Herein lies the key to your earthly pursuits.
📸 photo of the week:
Gabor Maté, a brilliant physician and all-around wise fellow, noted Winnie-the-Pooh was one of his favourite books.
I was skeptical at first. It seemed childish. But, I have thoroughly enjoyed the book.
If you're looking for a relaxing, casual, and funny nighttime read, with snippets of wisdom, look no further.
Thank you for reading!
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Much love to you and yours,
Tommy
Hey Tommy! I enjoy catching up with your Saturdays. Lotta things to ponder here.
Everything goes to zero in the end.
Maybe we need to spend less time worrying what we’re doing and more time just living. That is, doing what feels right.