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Hannah Wilkinson's avatar

I'm not sure which I preferred more: the essay or the essay breakdown. Nevertheless! A pure pleasure to read as always.

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you Hannah! Appreciate you reading & the kind words (:

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Amiee's avatar

Your comment on “waiting” makes me think of the Bible verse in Isaiah that says “they that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up on wings like eagles, they shall run and not grow weary, they shall walk and not faint…”

Waiting is supposed to renew our strength, but for so many it saps their strength. I wonder if we are waiting wrong…

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Ah I love that Amiee, thank you for sharing. I've been thinking of waiting a lot these days, in terms of how I wait. Waiting with a sense of expectancy, with a knowing that God will move.

The Psalms also have a curious insistence about waiting on God.

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Amiee's avatar

Exactly. It can be so darn difficult sometimes to get our heads to line up with our hearts. I have often felt that my heart is ahead on trusting and expecting God to move and my head takes time to catch up. Such a good reminder!

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James Bailey's avatar

Lovely perspective Aimee. We probably are waiting wrong. I sure am a lot of the time. I’m waiting impatiently when I could be waiting and trusting…waiting with faith…

Thank you for helping me see this distinction. 🙏

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Amiee's avatar

It hit me out of the blue and I was thinking it was something worthy of sharing! Glad it encouraged you.

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J.T. Murphy's avatar

Anticipation and memory allow us to relish experiences over and over. Why deprive ourselves the giddiness of a near-impossible dream? Why not enjoy the glorious thrill of a good recollection? The details may change when we achieve a goal, but that is not necessarily disappointing, just unexpected. The details may soften when we look back, but that makes them sweeter.

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Ah that's beautiful J.T. Thank you for sharing - couldn't have said it better myself!

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kora 🌊's avatar

lovely piece tommy! so interesting that you’ve kept pinterest as your one app - i can find myself scrolling on it endlessly, like it’s an infinite reverie

glad all seems to be well my friend

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you Kora, it's good to hear from you pal. I only use Pinterest on my browser. Interestingly, I find it enjoyable but not too addictive and can usually cap at 10 minutes a week, whereas with Twitter, even Substack, I'd get lost in the feed.

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Sarah Wheeler's avatar

love this essay, love newfoundland, love the writing process breakdown - thank you for sharing this 🤍

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you Sarah (:

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Carina's avatar

This was beautiful!!! Especially loved: "What if I run into reality and reality wins? What if I fold? Worse, what if I settle? What if the vision cracks and my hands are not calloused enough to caress the broken pieces?"

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you Carina (: so good to hear from you. Reading your words, my mind went to running into the fake tunnel painted on the side of the brick wall. Perhaps that's the image.

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Carina's avatar

That’s the image for sure!

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Karma lhendup bhutia's avatar

It was so good to read this

Got the bts of writing this beautiful piece....

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you (: appreciate the kind words & so glad it resonated

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Jen Vermet's avatar

Loved the essay breakdown Tommy! Keep it up with the walks and jogs :)

I used a similar process for my memoir last year of handwriting the whole thing, editing by using voice software and then editing again with a red pen in a printed version. But lately, since I'm more minimalistic these days, living out of a couple of backpacks for the past year, I've found recording drafts aloud is extremely useful. It's quick for me to see if my voice is actually in the piece. If I like reading it aloud, or if it's bland like a dry cracker. I still try to do some reverse outlining like the Dean does but sometimes the flow isn't so scientific and I just let it roll like a wave. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

keep it up! I love how your job has created constraints and still allows such interesting ideas to percolate. Something hat give my hope in my own transition and search :)

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thanks Jen! So good to hear from ya (:

I think my writing process continues to evolve, and differs with the mood or sentiment of each piece, but I've been trying to return to more analog ways of creating. Pen and paper (how every great work was ever written across all time haha). I also like pulling from very nonchalant kinds of writing, journal entries or emails or texts even to friends - where I'm not trying to sound smart or worrying if my thoughts are interesting.

A job certainly adds constraints to my writing, in ways that are both good and painful. But it's the reality I've chosen, despite the tradeoffs, and I don't wish I had decided differently.

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Imaan Mo.'s avatar

Read this in a hospital waiting room. so much happening in my life atm and honestly this just reassured me that i’m not alone. i don’t fancy the idea of waiting as well as i can be a bit impatient most of the time. but what is life without looking forward to anything? Thank you, tommy. For sharing such a beautiful piece. You’re not alone.⭐️

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you Imaan (: appreciate you reading & your beautiful reflection here

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Fanny Astikasari's avatar

Those handwritings are very surprising tho. Enjoy the present moment! 😊✨

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Mary Rose's avatar

Thank you for this essay, Tommy. I’m currently experiencing a lot of change in my life, and it’s so easy to look back and cling to what was. I needed the reminder that love looks forward!

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Tommy Dixon's avatar

Thank you Mary Rose, appreciate you reading & the kind words (:

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macs's avatar

I like to think it’s possible to have gratitude for what is present while also allowing yourself the creative liberty to imagine all the versions of what’s left of the story. It may feel sad sometimes to only get one, which may not resemble any of what you once authored yourself, but the privilege to dream is a consolation prize I happily accept, and would dearly miss if the future suddenly lost its ambiguity. Wonderful writing as always :)

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Candace Cooney's avatar

Very interesting to see a bit of your writing process!

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